So today my fieance of nearly 10 months left me. She said that she wanted to do waht she wants when she wanted and not have to feel guilty about it. She had previously been in a 4 year long relationship in which her partner was abusive. I met her about a month after that ended, though her relationship with him was dead since he happened to be incarcerated for a while prior to the break up. So we initially hit it off and were dating within a week of meeting, everything had been going perfectly until the last month or so. She suddenly decided that she needed to have friends after not wanting to have them the entire relationship. So she decideds shes going to meet these "friends" online. Now when I met her she was a member of an online dating site and had left it as per my request once we started dating. Now within the last week she magically has friends that are within a few miles of her house. So after I noticed she started getting all sorts of texts and phone calls I asked whats up and low and behold its a bunch of strange men. And she is talking to them and making plans to hang out with them. This of course did not make me very happy so we began to fight about it. Now two days ago her slut friend ( i say this because she sleeps with a new person a couple times a week) has a party, and she goes to it and ends up sleeping with a guy there. She didnt have sex with him, but i know how she cuddles. Anyway thats cheating to me. So she tells me this today and we break up.
She incists that i have done nothign wrong and that im perfect, and that she doesnt deserve me. So shes hurting me now so she doesnt hurt me later. She wants to find herself and be a normal 20 yr old. (im 24) I have given her everything that I am, and I have put more of myself into our relationship than I have anyhting else in my life. I love her plain and simple, through and through. I cant find myself to be mad at her, but I am so torn apart that I am losing the best thing in my life. She has brought me nothing but joy and happyness on a level I never thought possible. I didnt want it to end, and I think her reasons for ending it are well pointless. She says she loves me and she couldnt see marrying anyone else.
So now we are apart as of 6 today. She needs time to find herself, as much as I hate it but I cant do anyhting. I want her back and maybe in a little while she may whant to come back to me. I cant imagine her with another man, and my head tells me to not take her back if she becomes involved with someone or some other men, but my heart still wants her back and is willing to forgive.
I dont know waht to do, she still wants to be friends, and I dont want to lose her completly. Im just lost.
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